Frank Field the magician

AUGUST 25 06

Have you seen Frank Field the magician? He works the underground cabaret scene. I'm still blown away by his performance last night. I want to tell you about it. It was late, all the other acts at the club had already been on and we were waiting for Frank Field to arrive. The buzz was that this guy was something different. But he hadn't arrived. Then this tiny guy was walking into the room, tables dotted about, drinks on them. He was the smallest person I'd ever seen, about one and a half foot tall, maybe two foot, he wore a black leather hat had black sideburns and yellow tinted glasses. He walked strangely. And he was carrying about half a dozen sharp throwing knives. Despite his height, he looked like a very dangerous man and as he gazed about people were shifting their chairs away from him uncomfortably.

He explained to the MC on the mic that he had to wash up and get ready. He walked off into a back room. About ten minutes later he came out. He was transformed. He was twice the height, he was about three foot, a midget whose arrival as an evil dwarf was part of his act. The knives were gone, that must have been part of the aura-creating effect. He had ginger hair, looked fairly ordinary for a midget, his clothes now suggested stage magician. He was smiling. He carried on a few sheets of glass about two foot by three foot. He laid the sheets of glass at his feet and said, 'Hello, I'm Frank Field the magician' and no sooner had he said that than he completely disappeared into nowhere leaving his head floating around the audience. The second it happened I just couldn't help saying very loudly 'Bloody hell'. The head started to decompose and shrink while it was floating round, it started smoking and turning green and putrid. It floated really close by sometimes and I thought I saw a wire holding it but still that didn't explain how he had just disappeared right in front of our eyes. Some women were screaming as this freakish head floated by them. Eventually it just shrunk away to nothing and was gone.

We were totally floored by this performance, never seen anything like it before. I just thought Christ stage magic has come on a bit. Frank Field then returned to the stage, walking on. He was going home now. That was it, he didn't really need to do any more. I noticed he had hair as if growing out of the back of his shirt collar. What a weird fellow, I thought. I said goodbye to him as I seemed to be the only person he was looking at when he left. Then I woke up with a start at the transition. It was a dream. But a very real dream. It explained how he managed to create such a superb illusion. I hope Frank Field comes to a dream cabaret somewhere near you soon. Because he's good. Very very good.